Cap'n Howdy's Best of 2014: Guardians of the Galaxy

 So now it's time for the Cap'n to eat some serious crow. From the moment it was announced until the second I said "ah, what the hell, if people love it this much, I'll give it a shot," there wasn't a person more skeptical of Guardians of the Galaxy than me. There was no way it could work: we're talking about a comic book that nobody read (and even less have heard of) where a talking raccoon and a talking tree are major characters. Marvel had gone from "Dark Elves" to "What the Hell, We're Rich" hubris in no time, announcing Guardians of the Galaxy, Ant-Man, and Doctor Strange. Okay, there's no way. Guardians of the Galaxy? The hero's name is Star Lord? Seriously? I don't even read Green Lantern comics anymore, and I've never paid attention to Marvel's cosmic crap. There's no way it could be good. And the trailers didn't change my mind. It looks kitschy, obnoxious, loud, and unfunny. Drop the mic, I'm calling it: failure.

 And now I'm 0-3 when it comes to James Gunn. Somehow, I always doubt that he can make something so impossibly lame sounding be great, and he proves me wrong. Every time. Did I think Slither looked stupid? Yup. Wrong. Along comes Super, and I look at the poster and think "oh, great, hipster Kick-Ass." Totally wrong. So of course I foolishly thought that this time, as the director of a stupid space movie with talking trees, he wouldn't be able to craft a winner. That they'd mute his Troma sensibilities, and the end result would be watered down garbage nobody would like.

 Yeah, and how did that turn out?

 It's true that I'm not the only person surprised that Guardians of the Galaxy is one of the best movies of 2014, but at least I should have known better. Gunn's specialty, it seems, is finding the perfect tone of his movies, one that can comment on how ridiculous genre tropes are without undermining the story he's telling. It's a balancing act that not many directors are willing to try, the obvious exception being Marvel's other cosmic tinkerer, Joss Whedon. At the risk of sounding heretical and thus sending the internet into fan rage, I'm going to give the edge to Gunn, if only because in my limited field sample, he's more consistently successful*. Allow me to make my case.

 (In what might turn out to be a horrible idea, I'm going to assume anybody reading this already saw Guardians of the Galaxy, so the standard "paragraph or two synopsis" isn't going to be here, where it would normally be. Also, SPOILERS.)

 Guardians of the Galaxy, as presented in the film (I've still never read the comic), is an inherently goofy premise. If you want a very quick version of why, I highly recommend you watch the Honest Movie Trailer for the film. Putting aside the "Space Avengers" part, we are talking about a movie with more impenetrable monologues than the Star Wars Prequels combined, about characters we know nothing about, and can barely relate to - remember, Peter Quill / Star Lord (Chris Pratt) has been living most of his life in space. He has a better idea of what's going on than we do, and he doesn't really seem to know or care. Quill can barely remember that the girl he hooked up with is still on his ship. But that's what's great about how Gunn manages the world he's introducing us to - the serious moments, like everything building up to "I'm going to be honest; I forgot you were here" is played in equal parts important and "yeah, I know, this is kind of silly." There were a dozen ways to make the dancing to "Come and Get Your Love" groan worthy, but you know what wasn't? Using a dead space rat as a microphone.

 Mind you, this is all following the "young Peter Quill watches his mother die and is abducted by aliens" cold open, which isn't joke-y and sets the stage for things to come. While it's a completely different kind of movie, Guardians of the Galaxy shares with Captain America: The Winter Soldier the ability to be funny one moment and deadly serious the next. Gunn only uses it when necessary, but in many ways, he does it more successfully than the cheap kills in The Avengers or The Winter Soldier. I mean, yes, he kills Groot (Vin Diesel), but it's more of a sacrifice than a sudden "gotcha!" kill. When Baby Groot emerges at the end of the film, it makes sense that it was something he could do, and something that Rocket (Bradley Cooper) wouldn't realize was possible. Which is weird, because he's a living tree, so why couldn't he? Also, go ahead and be the hard hearted bastard that tells me you didn't well up a little bit at "WE are Groot." Go for it. It's the internet, and you can lie anonymously.

Despite the fact that Groot is Guardians of the Galaxy's equivalent of Minions or Penguins or Disney's anthropomorphized animals that every movie for kids have these days, we care about what happens to Groot because Rocket cares about Groot. And we care about Rocket, which honestly amazes me. I really did not think that I was going to be able to get past the "there's a talking raccoon in this movie," but the animators and Bradley Cooper and Gunn find a way. There's a moment, halfway into the film, where we learn everything we need to know about how a talking raccoon feels about being genetically modified. It's not dissimilar to the fight between Drax (Dave Bautista) and Ronan the Accuser (Lee Pace), where the real weight of the former's need for revenge clashes headlong into his inability to actually carry it out. Ronan, who up until this point just did a lot of speechifying and sent Nebula (Karen Gillan) to do his dirty work, finally seems formidable. Drax doesn't stand a chance, and that's before Ronan has the Infinity Gem.

 See, that's an extremely nerdy sentence, and I'm not going to lie, I had to double check Karen Gillan's character name. Yet another reason why it's so impressive that Guardians of the Galaxy was not only a hit with fickle comic fans, but also mainstream audiences. It's not quite on the same level of "A Song of Ice and Fire is hit TV show? Seriously?" but we are talking about a movie that introduces us to planets, characters, races, and throws around terms like we're just expected to keep up. And we do! I had no idea that Gamora (Zoe Saldana) and Nebula were adopted children of Thanos (uncredited Josh Brolin) or that Nova wasn't just one dude. Seriously, had I known the Nova Corps was the Marvel equivalent of the Green Lantern Corps, I might have hesitated even more. I think the only part of this movie I didn't know because of another Marvel movie (mostly Thor: The Dark World) was Howard the Duck. And let's be honest here, even if you read Howard the Duck, we all know why people remember Howard the Duck.

 But this is what I get for assuming it wasn't going to work. James Gunn pulls a fast one on me again, with a fantastic cast, razzle dazzle effects, smart (and smart-ass) plotting, and damn if I'm not looking forward to seeing more of them. He managed to introduce five major new characters and a dozen or so supporting characters without needing separate movies to do it. No offense, Phase One, but it turns out you can incorporate characters in one film, give them enough time to develop, and still be entertaining without spending two hours apiece with them. And hey, now I know who Chris Pratt is! He's not just the guy who crapped himself in Movie 43 anymore!

 Guardians of the Galaxy did something I didn't think was possible: it handily displaced X-Men: Days of Future Past and Captain America: The Winter Soldier as the best Marvel film of 2014. I'd say "comic book film," but if we're putting it up against Snowpiercer, it's a tougher case to make. It's a breezy, fun movie, one that has a soundtrack and vaguely 80s tone that appeal across the age spectrum, and Gunn even snuck in Nathan Fillion (Blue Alien in Prison), Rob Zombie (Ravager voice), and Lloyd Kaufman (Lloyd Kaufman Covered in Mud in Prison), just to keep his case for auteur in the mix. It might be super nerdy and have a talking tree and a talking raccoon, but dammit, they're fun. It's fun. Way to prove me wrong, James Gunn.




 * It's not an exactly fair comparison, but I do know several people who can't stand Joss Whedon and who had a lot of problems with the see-saw tonal shifts in The Avengers. They also didn't like Serenity for much the same reason, but enjoyed Guardians of the Galaxy. So, uh, flame on, I guess.

Geek Tuesday... for some reason.

 New release Tuesdays are usually a grab bag of fun new titles, back catalog releases / upgrades, and every now and then a out-of-left-field cult curveball. For a film geek, it's fun to scour "new release" lists to see what's coming out, so I can only imagine heads were exploding (Scanners style) this past Tuesday. Three extremely "geek friendly" DVDs / Blu-Rays dropped, each of which had a mixed reaction and not amazing box office numbers along for the ride. I've seen two of them, but not the other one (yet): Paul, Your Highness, and Super.


 If you haven't been following the Blogorium for long (and the Cap'n welcomes new arrivals), each film comes from a particular pedigree of nerd fandom: Paul is the "two geeks pick up an alien in the desert" film written by and starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz), is directed by Greg Mottola (Superbad, Adventureland), and also features Jason Bateman (Arrested Development), Sigourney Weaver (Alien), Seth Rogen (Pineapple Express), Jo Lo Truglio (The State), Kristen Wiig, and Bill Hader (both SNL). The film begins at the San Diego Comic Con and is packed with references to other geeky alien movies. I generally enjoyed Paul, but the film doesn't really pick up until Wiig's arrival in the film, mostly because Paul isn't so much of a character as he is Seth Rogen before she enters the narrative.


 Your Highness is David Gordon Green (All the Real Girls, George Washington)'s much anticipated follow-up to Pineapple Express, the film that moved Green from "indie filmmaker" to "mainstream sellout" in some eyes, but to many of us was a logical preamble to Eastbound and Down. Your Highness re-teamed Green with Danny McBride and James Franco along with Natalie Portman (Leon: The Professional), Justin Theroux (Mulholland Dr), Zooey Deschanel (500 Days of Summer), and was an ode to the sword and sorcery fantasy genre that was omnipresent in the 1980s. I must admit that other than Conan the Barbarian, I was never that into the whole movement, and only one website really seemed very excited about Your Highness when the film actually came out, so I skipped out on it. It's not highly regarded by critics or audiences, and when I couldn't make a $1.50 Theatre showing, it seemed best to let the film slide. I will give it a shot some time soon, because I do trust the creative team.



 Super splits critics right down the middle: James Gunn (who wrote Zack Snyder's Dawn of the Dead remake and directed the amazing Slither) took a very Troma-esque approach to the "super hero in the real world" subgenre (see: Kick-Ass, Defendor, Special, Paper Man, and a few others I'm forgetting), starring Rainn Wilson (The Office), Ellen Page (Juno), Kevin Bacon (Hollow Man), Michael Rooker (Slither), Nathan Fillion (Serenity) and very briefly, Linda Cardellini (Freaks and Geeks). It's a twisted, at times extremely violent and crude film, and as many people hate it as love it. I have the feeling that some of that comes from the influence of Lloyd Kaufman's Troma Films, where Gunn cut his teeth - there are parts of Super that feel like they've been directly lifted from The Toxic Avenger, and if Troma team releases aren't your thing, Super might not be either. However, if you even liked Slither, you should check out Super.

 It was odd to see all of them coming out on the same day, draining the wallets of geeks who can't be bothered to sit in a movie theatre anymore, because they share roughly the same history: lots of buzz preceding their release, mixed reviews, and moderate to tepid audience attendance. I don't know about Your Highness, but Super and Paul will probably have a long life on video because they appeal to the shut-in's and cast-out's that do, well, what I'm doing right now. Gee, I wonder if I have Paul and Super sitting on the table across the room? Maybe, but what are they sitting under? Bet you won't guess that one!

 (Hint: It's not Your Highness.)

  It is fair to point out that despite their lack of box office busting prowess, none of the discs appear to be bare-bones. This may be a sign that studios are aware that the geek demographic is willing to pay a little bit more for a high quality, high definition experience as long as the movie is packed to the gills with bonus content (Universal is very good at this, and while Paul isn't as loaded as, say, Scott Pilgrim with extra features, it's a better lineup than say, Paramount's True Grit Blu-Ray).

 Why all three on the same day? I don't really know, but maybe we ought not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Maybe it's an opportunity to kick back with some friends, some brewskis, and enjoy a laid back August weekend.




Hollow Man is what you guys think of when you hear "Kevin Bacon", right? Or maybe Death Sentence? Oh, and Michael Rooker has been in a lot more than just Slither, but Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer ate up too much space and I'm sure as hell not going to use Mallrats.

Blogorium Review: Super

In many ways, Super feels like James Gunn's response to Matthew Vaughn's Kick-Ass; Gunn (Slither, The Specials), who wrote and directed the film, seems to be taking the concept of a normal schlub turned masked vigilante in the "real" world and letting it play out without Hit Girl's and jetpacks with Gatling guns attached. The end result is vulgar, graphically violent, and at times bizarre. More importantly, it's funny, as long as your sense of humor is deeply twisted.

Frank D'Arbo (Rainn Wilson) is a nobody cook at a diner married to recovering junkie Sarah (Liv Tyler), until she leaves him for strip club owner / drug dealer Jacques (Kevin Bacon). When Frank tries to win her back, he pushes the rather reasonable Jacques to the point of unleashing his goons, Abe (Michael Rooker), Toby (Sean Gunn) and Quill (Stephen Blackheart), and a beating ensues. Unable to talk a police Detective (Gregg Henry) into helping him, Frank finds inspiration from Holy Avenger (Nathan Fillion), a TV Superhero that seems to be sending him messages directly through the show. After consulting comic book shop employee Libby (Ellen Page), Frank decides to become The Crimson Bolt, a masked vigilante who fights crime. His wave of righteous, if brutal, crime-fighting inspires Libby to join him as Boltie, The Crimson Bolt's sidekick, and together they storm Jacques' mansion(?) compound to save Sarah.

Off the bat, I have to tell you that Super is not for most people. Most of you will bristle at the violence, at the casual brutality visited on nearly every character, and the cavalier attitude towards bad taste. The tone is going to rub many audiences the wrong way - it's a little weird, a little sentimental, and a lot cruel. That said, if you loved Slither, or have a soft spot for Troma Team releases (not coincidentally where Gunn cut his teeth), you're going to love this film. We're talking about a movie that opens with an animated version of Frank's life, with a combination of melting bodies, bunny rabbits, and song-and-dance choreography, and features Rob Zombie as the voice of God*.

I understand that people really like Kick-Ass, and I don't. I hate Kick-Ass, if for nothing else than it gives up on its premise halfway through the film in order to appeal to geeks looking for something "bad ass." At a certain point, the experiment of "comic book hero in the real world" simply becomes "how many people can hit girl kill / call 'cunts'"? Instead of commenting on comic book violence, Kick-Ass settles to up the quotient and hope you forgot the premise.

Super doesn't stray into the realm of "unbelievable," aside from one of the strangest instances of "divine inspiration" you're likely to ever see. The film itself may be weird (and that's the best way to put it), but in terms of its premise, it keeps the rules clear. The Crimson Bolt loses his first fight, decides to research what non-super-powered heroes use, and settles on a wrench. Imagine a vigilante that runs up to criminals and smashes their head in with a wrench, and you have some idea of what kind of movie you're in for. The wrench hits are, shall we say, visceral, although it's far from as graphic as some violence gets later in the film.

It wasn't until after I finished Super that I realized the news coverage about The Crimson Bolt followed the same direction that The Toxic Avenger did, almost directly - the "victims" of The Crimson Bolt (and later, Boltie) are eventually revealed to be the pedophiles, drug dealers, and thieves Frank already knew they were, and somehow the public tide turns in his direction, just like Toxie. That this follows an expletive-laden "announcement" from Bolty about the dynamic duo makes it all the more amusing. Really, if the movie hasn't won you over by that point, Ellen Page's shift from Libby to Boltie will tip the scales in a big way.

Rainn Wilson's Frank D'Arbo** is a believable schlub; Wilson plays the loser as a basically nice guy who has been trod his entire life and just wants a break. For the brutality he dishes out, Frank is surprisingly old fashioned in his morals - when Libby becomes, shall we say, increasingly randy, and tries to seduce Frank, he freaks out and reminds her he IS married and that he takes that very seriously. That said, it doesn't really work; I don't want to spoil too much, but it is one of the more twisted and hilarious sex scenes you'll see this year.

Ellen Page wasn't doing much for me as Libby, a character that's mostly trying too hard to be appealing in an otherwise unappealing world, but that shift to Boltie changes everything. When she puts the costume on and feels free to go crazy, not only does a wanton cruelty emerge, but Boltie can't seem to stop calling The Crimson Bolt "Frank" in front of everyone, and her enthusiasm lifts the film at a much needed juncture.

Kevin Bacon is probably the biggest surprise in the film; he plays Jacques as a sleazeball that's really trying not to be. When Frank charges up to him outside of his club (Bare Assets), Jacques tries to be the bigger man in the situation, even after D'Arbo starts hitting his car and screaming at him. I think you're supposed to hate him, but until the end I kind of liked Jacques, because Kevin Bacon is so reasonable and Frank seems so unreasonable.

Liv Tyler doesn't have much to do as the damsel-in-distress Sarah, but she's generally likable and you believe that she could fall for Frank. I honestly didn't know which of the goons was Gunn's brother and which one was Blackheart, but they were fine - the real star of that show is Rooker, whose Abe likes eating candy and listening to music when not hurting people. Nathan Fillion's stoic Holy Avenger is likely to give fans of The Hammer a great topic of discussion: which Fillion "superhero" is better (Cranpire also suggests his "supervillian" Preacher from Buffy the Vampire Slayer be part of the debate). There are a few other nice cameos I won't mention, although I question why of all of them Linda Cardellini's pet shop employee made it into the opening credits when she's barely in the movie.

I must reiterate that fans of The Office and Dwight Schrute are probably going to hate Super. Ellen Page fans from Juno and Whip It are more than likely going to hate Super. Fans of Kick-Ass are probably going to hate Super. People with an iota of good taste are certainly going to hate Super. Some critics already hate Super because of what happens to Boltie (and one of the reviews on Rotten Tomatoes flat out spoils it). This is not a film for everyone, even if the posters are quite clever and it puts The Crimson Bolt's catchphrase ("Shut up, crime!") to good use. I think people are expecting a more kitschy, indie comedy and are getting something much more demented.

Super is mostly going to appeal to a) people who were underwhelmed with Kick-Ass, and b) existing James Gunn fans. If you liked Slither and Tromeo and Juliet, or the off kilter tone of Scooby Doo, Dawn of the Dead (2005) or The Specials (which he wrote) , then this is going to be right up your alley. You can take James Gunn out of Troma, but you can't take the Troma out of James Gunn, and this is certainly a more polished version of a Troma superhero movie. If that sounds like something you'd want to see, I feel strongly you're going to really enjoy Super.


* I did not realize this until looking it up on IMDB, but considering the film, its wholly appropriate. *Which, by the way, is suspiciously similar in spelling to Frank D'Amico, Mark Strong's character in Kick-Ass.