Several Notes, some even worthy.

Programming Note: As I intend to actually have a "Best Of" before 2010 begins (uncommon for the Cap'n, I admit), I'm going to avoid writing full reviews of Inglourious Basterds, Up, Extract, Public Enemies, World's Greatest Dad, and anything else I might see before Friday (all hope is not lost for Up in the Air and The Road) and simply let you guess where they'll land.

I sincerely doubt they'll be numbered, because it's going to be tricky choosing which is "better" when the field includes films as diverse as Drag Me to Hell, Moon, Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans, Thirst, Anvil: The Story of Anvil, The Hangover, Trick R Treat, Coraline, Tyson, District 9, Zombieland, and *blog spoiler* Inglourious Basterds.

(Yes, it's true: I don't understand how you could not enjoy the latter film, even if you were expecting all Basterds all the time, but we'll get to that later this week.)

And what am I to do with Crank: High Voltage? What indeed, dead readers?

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Housecleaning Note:

Okay, I'm really at a loss to who this "Grampa J" is, or what @Josh@TheMovies is all about. Clearly I've noticed the resemblance between the blogorium, and poor writing and lackluster criticism aside, this yokel is treading in my territory.

It's one thing to parody the Cap'n, but to sell yourself with a pilfered photo and no indication of who you actually are is bordering on slanderous. I wouldn't mind if he weren't such an awful writer, but take a gander as this passage from his review called @ Sherlock Holmes:

"Anyway, after they go and save the girl at the beginning the evil guy gets hung and comes back to life! I won't spoil anything for you but I have to hand it to the director that this was a really clever Idea. Just too bad there had to be so much bad stuff along the way. There were explosions too, which was weird becuase horror movies usually don't have stuff blowing up in them."

I mean, you're kidding me, right? I wrote that? Seriously? Without getting into the nitty gritty details, like the fact that "Grampa J" claims to be fairly new to movie going in general - so how could he possibly know what horror movies do and don't have explosions - or the lazy punctuation, capitalization, and spelling, didn't I already review Sherlock Holmes? Oh right, I did. On Friday. It's funny how he started by reviewing a movie I famously stated I would never see, then posts a contrary and poorly thought out counter-review to my existing Holmes write-up...

Folks, I've played my share of gags on you before, but this is not one of them. This cat is horning in on the one thing I take pride on, and while I'm quite fond of my moniker (Cap'n Howdy), surely you can tell what's my writing and what isn't. If this is one of you, please step forward and we can proceed peacefully. Otherwise, look forward to savage commenting on every single ensuing post, "Grampa J".

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On a final note, this video of Star Trek: The Next Generation is quite amusing to me. The re-dubbed soundtrack takes pains to match the lip movements of cast members, so the end result is a nearly incomprehensible conversation of non sequiturs.