Over the last week or so, the Cap'n has been hearing quite a bit about Joel and Etan Cohen. No, not the Coen brothers (named Joel and Ethan) but two wholly unrelated Cohens - even to each other - that are active enough in Hollywood to have fooled fans and, sadly, actors.
In a recent GQ interview, Bill Murray admitted the reason he signed on to Garfield in the first place was because he thought that Joel Cohen (one of the screenwriters) was Joel Coen (of "The Coen Brothers" fame). But alas, it was not, as you can read for yourself (or merely surmise). Rather, it was the Joel Cohen who had a hand in writing Toy Story, and also wrote Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties (which Bill Murray was also involved in... interesting...). He is also credited with script duties or "story" for Cheaper By the Dozen, Daddy Day Camp, Evan Almighty, Money Talks, and Walter the Farting Dog (info available at IMDB pro).
Etan Cohen was brought to my attention by vigilant reader Doctor Tom, who noticed his name as a co-writer on Tropic Thunder. I had been seeing his name recently as a result of my roommate's fascination with King of the Hill, of which Etan Cohen is a producer. A little digging made it clear that this is not some pseudonym cooked up by the Coen brothers (like their longtime, nonexistent editor Roderick Jaymes), but in fact an Etan Cohen that's twenty years younger and has his roots in early Mike Judge animation.
For example, in addition to producing and writing for King of the Hill, Etan Cohen also wrote two episodes of Beavis and Butt-Head, in addition to co-writing the screenplay for Idiocracy. He also had a hand in writing Recess, Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa, an episode of American Dad, Men in Black III, and something called My Wife is Retarded.
Now, it's not uncommon to make this mistake. I know half a dozen people who regularly write "The Cohen Brothers" or Joel and Ethan Cohen, so I get that the confusion is there. What I find interesting, on the other hand, is this idea (admittedly concocted by the Cap'n) that these are Mirror Universe Coen brothers, trading on the confusion in order to perpetuate evil on the world. Okay, I like Tropic Thunder, Beavis and Butt-Head, and Idiocracy, but I think it's more than evened out by Men in Black III, American Dad, and whatever My Wife is Retarded is. If only Joel Cohen had a goatee and Etan Cohen did not...
On to the Mirror-Verse videos!
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Our first video is a Priceline commercial I'd never seen, but is wholly appropriate to today's theme:
Our second video, because it amused me following page after page of Star Trek Mirror Universe clips, was the Mirror Universe footage from Red Dwarf's season 8 finale:
Greetings, horror fanatics. As things get into full Summerfest swing here at the Apartment that Dripped Blood, the Cap'n has a special double dose of video mayhem to get your ready for the gore, the comedy, and the chills that await those brave enough to shamble over on Thursday night.
Additionally, before the official lineup kicks in on June 1st, I'll put up special bonus Summerfest reviews of [REC] and [REC 2] some time Thursday afternoon, along with brief thoughts on John Landis' Masters of Horror episode, Family.
Then it's time for the main event at 10pm, kicking off with... well, you'll just have to come by or read later to find out!
On to our special audiovisual selections!
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Our first video comes from Linnea Quigley's Horror Workout, which I someday hope to show in its entirety at a Horror Fest. It involves Quigley, zombies, aerobics, and a pool. The rest speaks for itself:
Our second video is The Best Bloody Moments in Horror History, which is exactly what it sounds like. Unlike most of the clip compilations the Cap'n finds, this one has a bit of context in between clips, which help keep this from being a random assemblage of gore. That being said, you're going to see some of the gorier moments in the genre's history, from the gut puking in City of the Living Dead to the facelift scene in Eyes without a Face. Ergo, I must make it clear this is probably NSFW:
A good Monday to all Blogorium readers. I thought I'd take some time out today to address ten of the most frequent questions that come up. The Cap'n isn't above doing more Q&A's, so if I leave something out, feel free to ask for future posts of this kind.
In the interest of keeping this from going on forever, I'm going to break up the questions over two days. For today, enjoy questions 1-5.
1. I have to ask, what the hell is that picture on the top of the Blogorium?
The picture that greets you every time you come to Cap'n Howdy's Blogorium is Doctor Re-Animator. It's a screen grab from "Move Your Dead Bones," which is this strange techno-dance video that's an extra on Beyond Re-Animator, which is the second sequel to Re-Animator and was (as best I can tell) never released theatrically in the U.S. It is not directly tied to the film, but I find it to be both hilarious and dangerously catchy.
See for yourself:
Two hours from now, that chorus will still be in your head. I promise.
2. Do you really post every day?
Whenever possible. There have been a few circumstances, usually tied to moving or unforeseeable circumstances, where I've missed the "chronological" or calendar version of "day" and had to post a little late, but I do try to have something new up every single day. Periodically you'll see a "From the Vaults" or I'll hand things over to a Guest Blogger if I know I won't be able to make good on this self-imposed productivity.
3. Are you Grampa J?
No, I am not Grampa J. For those of you new to the site, Grampa J is a blogger who runs @Josh@Themovies, a site that really seems hell bent on parodying the Cap'n by using my real name and pilfered photo. I don't know exactly where he came from, but I do have some idea who "he" is. Since Grampa won't go away, I will periodically point you in his direction for a particularly insipid review, and I've decided to hound him until he gives up this embarrassing ruse of identity theft.
4. Why do you do "theme" posts, and why are some of them so infrequent?
I do the theme posts to keep things interesting, both for me and for you. It's true that I watch enough that I could easily do reviews every day, and there's enough news going on that I could also constantly link and react to the goings on in Hollywood, but after the first year or two, that got a little dull. So I decided to spice it up.
For new readers, I'll break them down for you:
There are two "theme" posts that will appear every week - Video Daily Doubles on Wednesday and Trailer Sundays on, well, Sunday. Video Daily Doubles are devoted to short films, random clips, or movie related ephemera I find during the week, and Trailer Sundays are devoted to introducing you to movies you may have never heard of and might not otherwise. The VDD's are a little newer, but I find it breaks the week up in an entertaining way.
As for the rest, they're broken down thusly:
Five Movies - It's exactly what it sounds like. Five movies that fit into some theme, designed to give you new titles to look into or to remind you of films that you saw and maybe forgot about.
Four Reasons- Here I'll try to take one movie or series and reconsider or revisit aspects that may not have occurred to me (or you) before. It's a much more specific post than Five Movies, and I use it to distinguish from longer Reviews.
So You Won't Have To - When the Cap'n is feeling particularly masochistic, I'll sometimes sit down and watch a movie that no one in their right mind would endure otherwise. I do so typically because I have some lingering interest in one aspect of the film or another, and the subsequent review (almost always a pan) is done so that you won't have to watch what I just finished. I'll always try to address the morbid fascination I had coming to the movie, in the hopes that it will satisfy any questions you had. Consider it an occupational hazard and a courtesy rolled into one.
From the Vault - I haven't always been here at Blogspot. For years I wrote on Livejournal and Myspace, and while both of those accounts have been abandoned, I did like some of the writing I did there, and will periodically re-post it for people who haven't been aware of the Cap'n. There's around 10 years worth of writing out there, and some of it is even good, so you can expect more every now and then.
Guest Blogger - There actually aren't that many of these. Typically I like to generate all of the content here at the Blogorium (it is, after all, my moniker attached to the top of the page), but every now and then I'll have a contest or ask somebody to be my DH for a day. It could even be you (more details tomorrow).
As to why some appear more frequently than others, I can say that Five Movies and Four Reasons take more time to put together than a review, so I do them less often. I enjoy them, but the preparation time is a little more involved. The So You Won't Have To's have been a little lax lately because, well, I haven't seen too many bad movies. If there's something particularly heinous you're interested in that's not Twilight, let me know.
5. How do you pick the movies you watch?
I have a pretty extensive collection of films here at Blogorium Central, many of which I haven't seen or have not seen in years. I also have a Netflix account and shop frequently at Edward McKay's Used Books and More, where I can find all kinds of movies I've never heard of. It's generally a combination of those three elements, interspersed with recommendations from you (the readers), films I watch in class, or screenings around town.
Questions 6-10 will appear tomorrow afternoon. Stay frosty, everybody!
Where are you folks landing on The Wolf Man? I really can't make up my mind if I want to see it or not. The Cap'n is a massive fan of the Lon Chaney version, and also The Howling, An American Werewolf in London, Curse of the Werewolf, Ginger Snaps, and, of course, Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man. I'm not even torn up about this being a remake with Benicio Del Toro taking over as Lawrence Talbot, which is odd for me. Usually I get all up in arms about this, but with every other Universal classic monster movie remade or being remade (okay, minus The Invisible Man), I'm surprising not perturbed. Bram Stoker's Dracula is the high water mark, and then it drops off considerably with Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, and The Mummy.
Still, I just can't decide if I want to watch the movie, considering all of the insane stories about various directors, effects permutations, and cuts of the film. Is it worth dropping $10 for?
Thanks, Mr. Budweiser with Clamato. Sometimes I lose sight of the important things, like movies with werewolves. And not ones with werewolves fighting mopey vampires*, but actual werewolves tearing people up and being hunted by Hugo Weaving. And where the gypsy woman is Geraldine Chaplin, for crying out loud!
What folly possessed the Cap'n?
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It is amazing, considering how cgi-happy studios are, that no one's tried mounting an Invisible Man movie since Hollow Man. Of course, when even the director of Hollow Man (Paul Verhoeven) calls his movie a "piece of shit", maybe it's not so surprising.
Oddly, I'm sadder about the impending Creature from the Black Lagoon remake, even though it stands a chance of being more suspenseful just by dropping the ubiquitous "Creature" theme:
Seriously, that "Bum bah Baaaaaaaaah!" plays every. single. time. the Creature is on camera. It's ridiculous. As much as I heart that movie, the score kills me, because it instantly makes you not afraid of the Creature.
This has nothing to do with Creature from the Black Lagoon, but I guess I do have to thank those awful Mummy remakequels for giving the world The Scorpion King. That's some small comfort, right?
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And finally:
This is tangentially related to film, insofar as it chronicles the difficulties of setting up a home entertainment system. Really, I'm including it because a) who is making the complaint and b) how hard it made me laugh by the end:
* I know you thought I was talking about Twilight, but in this case the Underworld movies are just as, if not more, apropos.
I'm not really sure why I'm so irked by this, but the DVD for Big Fan arrived yesterday, and I have to say it has one of the worst covers for a movie, especially considering the subject matter. Allow the picture to speak a thousand words, followed by a few of mine:
Okay, so anybody who's seen Big Fan will notice immediately that the DVD cover makes the film look like some kind of inspirational sports film starring Patton Oswalt as a mentally handicapped NY Giants fan. Seriously. That's what the juxtaposition of the picture of Oswalt to the cheering fans at the game suggests. It's very Radio-esque. That is not what Big Fan is. In an odd and pathetic way, it is uplifiting at the end, but not even close to the way that cover makes it look.
To wit, here's the theatrical poster:
First off, I will openly admit that it's less aesthetically pleasing than the stupid DVD cover, but as unmarketable as this image is, it perfectly conveys the tone of the film. This is the story of Paul Aufiero, this total loser that gives no positive impression on you and who would let a football player beat the shit out of him and do nothing. Not the chubby man-child who loves football and finally goes to the big game where the Giants win and give him the game ball.
So that's my two cents on the bungling of that DVD artwork. Stay tuned for videos.
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Video Daily Double Part One: 40 Inspiration Speeches in 2:15.
Strangely, it kinda did the trick for me. I feel quite motivated to fight aliens or the British. Or something...
Finally, Video Daily Double Part Two: the trailer for Wall Street 2: Money Never Sleeps.
I really have no idea how I feel about this. It's a well made trailer, but I can't help but worry about the movie. It may be the most unnecessary sequel there is...
Now, it's not uncommon to make this mistake. I know half a dozen people who regularly write "The Cohen Brothers" or Joel and Ethan Cohen, so I get that the confusion is there. What I find interesting, on the other hand, is this idea (admittedly concocted by the Cap'n) that these are Mirror Universe Coen brothers, trading on the confusion in order to perpetuate evil on the world. Okay, I like Tropic Thunder, Beavis and Butt-Head, and Idiocracy, but I think it's more than evened out by Men in Black III, American Dad, and whatever My Wife is Retarded is. If only Joel Cohen had a goatee and Etan Cohen did not...
