Hold on, Ricky!

If you're attending Bad Movie Night (and many of you have indicated you are), you should be thanking Borders right now. Since they marked down their dvd inventory 40%, my quest for the "Bag of Badness" became much easier.

Oh, did the Cap'n not mention the "Bag of Badness"?

Funny you should ask, me, because every attendee of Bad Movie Night will be reaching into said bag and pulling out their own terrible, horrible, no good really bad movie to take home. And you will take it home.

If you're wise, you'll use it to make your own Bad Movie Night. That way you can do the same thing to me when I attend (which I promise I will).

What can lucky BMN-ers expect when they reach into the bag? Well, I'd hate to ruin the surprise, but I'll give you some hints:

80s cheese
Double and Triple features
Unnecessary sequels
Keanu Reeves
Giant Monsters
Musicals
Explosions
Martin Short

Are you excited yet? You will be, because I'm not done on my quest yet... There's always Edward McKay's Used Books and more.

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After watching Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky at home last night, I'm going to spill the beans that it's more than likely the "surprise" movie. This does mean that Punisher: War Zone will only be sampled along with other contenders / offenders.

What Riki-Oh does is take a Peter Jackson movie and drop it into a kung fu film. The gore is there, the heavy synth score, the inventive shots and angles. Hell, even the "final monster" is reminiscent of Dead Alive.

But instead of people with New Zealand accents, you have questionable Mandarin or Cantonese dubbing with subtitles transcribed by a drunken baboon. There will be a drinking game associated with the number of misspelled words, questionable sentences, or outright incomprehensible translations. I promise, those who play will be rather sloshed by the end.

The Story of Ricky is just weird enough and just violent enough to keep you captivated and disgusted for 88 minutes, which is exactly what I could hope for. Why on earth it didn't occur to me before is a mystery.

Consider it my gift to you on the weekend after my *ahem* birthday. Between Troll 2, Mac and Me, The Story of Ricky, and Batman & Robin, you're going to have a very good time. I'm also putting together a trailer reel from Youtube to show between movies, and thanks to Mr. Cranpire, Doctor Re-Animator will be making a return appearance. Perhaps more than once. If Saturday isn't enough, perhaps I'll spill it over to Sunday, and maybe start early on Friday after Crank: High Voltage. I mean, The Giant Claw deserves a shot too.

Off to remove some tags. I'm about four movies away from the perfect "Bag of Badness", and I know exactly where to find the rest. Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.